Kitchen Gadgetry No. 2

Kitchen Gadgetry No. 2 © Robert Jay Matejcek

Cookie-sheet abstract expressionism seemed like… a thing… to… try. At one point. Have a great weekend, everyone!

Harry Crane (of a Mark Rothko painting): “Two possibilities. Either Cooper loves it, and you have to love it, like, in an ‘Emperor’s New Clothes’ situation… or he thinks it’s a joke and you’ll look like a fool if you pretend to dig it.”

Salvatore Ramano: “People like him pretend they understand this.”

Harry Crane “Maybe he has a brochure in here, something that explains it…”

- Rich Sommer & Bryan Batt – Mad Men

About this image: digital photograph taken and modified with smart phone (minimally edited in iPhoto)

Nine-Gallon Splat

Looks like the birds actually missed a spot. Now where did I leave that glass cleaner again?!

Melanie Daniels: “I keep telling you, this isn’t ‘a few birds’! These are gulls, crows, swifts…”

Mrs. Bundy: “I have never known birds of different species to flock together. The very concept is unimaginable. Why, if that happened, we wouldn’t stand a chance! How could we possibly hope to fight them?”

-Tippi Hendren & Ethel Griffies – The Birds

About this image: digital photograph taken and modified with smart phone (minimally edited in Photoshop)

A Little Hole in the Wall

This doorway is built into the side of a ‘tunnel’ in/under the Eads Bridge, downtown STL. Kinda interesting. I wish I wasn’t so shaky, though (as you can see the following conversation didn’t work out very well for me).

Me: “Sooooo… do you… come here… often?!”

Tripod: *sighs & rolls eyes* “Puhleeeze.”

About this image: digital photograph, lightly modified

Pilings

So… I think these are pilings. They run along a pier, anyway. As you can tell I’m not that great with nautical stuff. Please don’t ask me to tie a fancy knot (that would get embarrassing in a hurry).

Steve Zissou: “Can you hear the Jack Whales singing?”

*distant horn sounding*

Ned Plimpton: “Beautiful. I wonder what they’re saying?”

Steve Zissou: “Well, actually that’s a sludge tanker over there…

*distant whales singing*

Steve Zissou: “There you go…”

- Bill Murray and Owen Wilson – The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou

About this image: digital photograph, lightly modified

Claw Hammer

So here’s a photograph of a hammer. Yup. I’m not proud of how rusty I let it get (although it made for some interesting textures). Remember, please don’t try this at h0me – be kind to your tools, people.

The Dude: “1972 Pontiac LeBaron.”

Younger Cop: “Color?”

The Dude: “Green. Some brown, or, uh, rust, coloration.”

Jeff Bridges & Christian Clemenson – The Big Lebowski

About this image: digital image, moderately modified

Supply

Hey, man… you can put your *wheat* in there (insert your own original and/or modified Saturday Night Live quote here)!  That line was highly revised, and let’s face it… not quite on par with the Bass-O-Matic or Cowbell skits. Any favorite material of your own? Oh well. You probably aren’t here here for my SNL lecture series… unless… you’re that clever land-shark, aren’t you?!

About this image: Digital Photo (elevator in Alton, Illinois) highly manipulated digitally and transferred onto… uhh… faux  iron framework on/inside 12″x12″ panel.